i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
