My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize