is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize