just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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