I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
