So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
