Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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