I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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