How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
