I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize