Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
