I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
