I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
