yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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