I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I love you. Go after that dick
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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