i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
