he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Randomize