just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize
