Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
