While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Randomize
