I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize