how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize