He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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