Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
