My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
