my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
