It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
It's Friday. Sex?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
