3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize