It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
