i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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