is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
