I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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