Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
