Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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