I must be too annoying 4 u.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
