i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
