just tell him i said nine months
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
