i don't plan on having that self control this summer
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
