You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
