i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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