Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize