You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
