Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
