It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize