I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
