So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize