What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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