Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
