During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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