Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
